i met Master in March of 2014 online through Fet looking for people in the city i was planning on moving to, to be closer to my daughter. i was still married at the time and was just deciding to sever an 18 year marriage due to incompatibility in the bedroom. Long story not relevant here. The first thing Master said when we started to talk was “I am married, and if that is a deal breaker with you I understand. But I can still talk and guide you if you want to just be friends.” Being married myself at the time and having years ago had a relationship with a married man, i told Him i did not have an issue with Him being married and that i would like to talk and get to know Him. This wonderful Dom called, texted, and messaged every day, sometimes as many as 10 times a day. Not being able to meet at that point gave us the opportunity to get to know each other, our wants, desires and dreams. This went on till the end of April when i finally moved.
i was so ready to meet Him i could hardly wait. When we met the first time, outside the Village Inn, the moment our eyes met and then after that first amazing kiss, i knew this was the Man i had been searching for my entire life. And from that point on i was on the journey of a lifetime and never looked back.
Master had been married for nearly 43 years, had 6 adult children and 16 grandchildren with 2 more on the way. He had tried to get His wife to join Him in His kinky desires and she wanted no part of it. Her attitude was, go do what you have to do, i just don’t want to know anything about it. He had had several subs/slaves over the years, most were long term, like 4-5 years each. He also had an ongoing play partner for over a period of 20 years. He was always careful and very discrete so as not to humiliate or embarrass His wife.
His entire family is Mormon and nobody would have accepted Him for His wants and desires, so He had to hide everything that made Him happy which was truly a sad way to have to live.
He continued to call and text and guide me every day after i got here. He gave me tasks to do and slowly but surly i turned over every aspect of my existence to Him and on August 21st 2014 i became His last and forever collared slave. It was the single most important day of my life except for the birth of my children. He was happy as was i. When i would start to feel like the second fiddle, He would reassure me that i was very important to Him and that He had “NEVER” felt about anyone as He was feeling about me. We had some difficulties because as He became more content and happy, His wife became more suspicious of what He was doing that was changing His attitude. She didn’t want Him to tell Her about His kink activities, but when she felt Him drawing away her wifely radar went haywire. It was a very difficult time because we weren’t able to see each other as often as either of us would have liked.
What i did during these times of loneliness was remember He loved and cared for me. He wasn’t getting what He needed emotionally from His wife. He continued to guide and control my everything. He insisted that i attend the educational classes at our local dungeon and then journal Him what i learned and what i thought i might like to try. He wanted and encouraged me to make friends within our kink community so that when He was not available i wasn’t left feeling sorry for myself. i also had the advantage of knowing that His wife was not having sex with Him for at least the last 10 years or so because of an automobile accident that left her with a condition that caused her pain whenever anyone touched her even lightly. So what i did was totally allow myself to view our situation as a poly relationship. She would clean His house, and do His laundry and keep food in the house for Him to eat, but for His mental and sexual gratification it was me that took care of and loved Him. This worked very well for me even though she didn’t know she was in a poly relationship. When your Dom/Master/Daddy is doing His job the right way, there’s no need to feel deprived or forgotten. This all was becoming quite comfortable and even though i craved seeing and being with Him more, i was truly happy and content. i would not have respected Him as i do had He left His wife and family for me. He had obligations that i totally wanted Him to fulfill. What would the point have been for Him to devastate the lives of so many family members to bring me into the big picture?? i was content to patiently wait and see what the future would bring. We are not young and there was always the chance that His wife could pass and we could then be together the way we wanted.
What eventually did happen was, not His wife that died, it was my Master. On November 2nd 2014 my sweet Master had a massive heart attack and died in His chair alone in His home except for His dog who was found laying with Him. It was the day that He would normally call and let me know when He would be over. That call never came and neither did my wake up call the next day. i found out via facebook that my Master was gone. i am not here for sympathy, i’m here to let you know it is all in your hands how you choose to view your relationship with this man you love and care about. Even though Master’s death devastated me to the point that all i could do was ask “Why didn’t you come as take me with you??” But even in that time of grief and devastation i was the one that took care of Him in the final hours prior to HIs burial. i attended His funeral with a few very dear friends that knew of our relationship and with their support, i waited for the family pay their final respect to Him at the cemetery and get in their cars to go back to the church to eat and have a family reunion of sorts. It was me that watched as the casket was prepared to make it’s final journey into the ground. It was me that was the last one to kiss my Masters casket before it was lowered. It was me that put my two roses into the grave with Him. And it was me that put the first two shovels of dirt into His grave and wish Him farewell. NOT HIS WIFE, who was too busy laughing and talking to family members that had come from far and wide for His funeral.
Please don’t be sad for me, my Master is still with me in spirit and continues to guide me from beyond. He is now all mine and i don’t have to share Him any longer with anyone. Please don’t worry and be so lonely and needy that you waste all the very precious time that is still yours and your Dom’s to share. Try to look at this as part of the journey that you are meant to take. Find things that you can do that will benefit you and your Dom when you are able to spend time with Him. He has you for a reason, he is not getting what he needs from his wife, or you wouldn’t be in the position you are in. Help him by being loving, supportive and caring and not complaining. If you truly are not happy and this is really a relationship that cannot fulfill you, then cut your loses and get out now before you hurt yourself and him any more. But, if he is really what you want and what makes you happy, make it work. You may be submissive but as a submissive you really do need to be strong. Sending you warm and supportive hugs and energy for your continued happiness.