So I had an epic fail day with daddy yesterday. Started off with a family call and setting some new rules and clarification of rules. Of course I jumped to conclusions that I take to much time and don’t want to be a pain. He assured me that he would communicate that to me if I became a pain. Then we talked about trust and always questioning trust. That it is on going and we have to check in on where the trust is. Thought this conversation had sunk in. This is part of my training communication, trust oh and leaning on daddy in times of need. Ended the call with saying I won’t do something. Boy was that a no no! I was called out on it and we discussed it well I listened so I understood what I did and why it was wrong. Again thought it sunk in. Trust!
Low and behold I had an emergency and I decided to not tell daddy immediately because he was busy with work and I didn’t want to bug him. Well that was not right! Guess it didn’t sink in! So instead of leaning on him in my time of need I hurt him and got scolded for not letting him be there for me.
This wasn’t about control for me or doing it intentionally it was about not being use to having a Dom to turn to guide me hold my hand. Maybe I didn’t trust that I am important and just maybe he wasn’t too busy for me. So on an incredible shitty day when I should of turned to daddy I did not and now I feel like some trust has been broken. I am sad I disappointed daddy. I am learning and no one ever said that training is easy. So yesterday I sunk.