I was asked that tonight and it had me thinking, What exactly makes a dominant man dominant? It’s not beating a woman senseless. It’s not being the most sadistic you can be. It’s not giving and barking orders around. It’s not gathering up women to abuse and use. It’s not forcing a woman to do things for you. None of that makes a man dominant.
A dominant man is a leader first and foremost. He is a care giver to his Submissives. He cherishes her. He gives her focus, ignites her desires, offers her his strength, his wisdom, displays his passions for her and for life, unveils his ideals. She drinks them all deeply internalizing what he tells her. They talk, discuss, but most of all they trust. Trust that he won’t lead her astray, that her best interest is in his heart, that he will protect and care for her. They trust that he has lived enough to know how to wrap her in is protection. That she will never feel fear, that she won’t need for anything. Her dominant will be there for her to rely on in times of need and desires.
A dominant man is courageous, he knows that he must stand with his girl in the face of adversity. That she is worthy of being the object of his protection. He doesn’t waiver in that protection. She in turn feels safe and cared for, allowing her to give herself fully to him. There is nothing that could pull her away from him once that bond is cemented. It’s like a tightly woven fiber that’s strength is its power.
I am one of the lucky ones. One that found such a man. One that play time is wonderful, but not the base of the relationship. That base of the relationship is true dominance-leadership and kindness, caring and compassion, respect and reverence. It’s the ying and the yang of life. They provide for each other what they need to keep that energy going. It is a finely tuned dance of dominance and submission. One that I do daily, often and with complete, unbridled, exuberant joy. I am simply honored to be his.